A man and a woman both reaching to their wallets to share the restaurant bill.It’s the issue we have all encountered at some time or another: who should pay on a date?
It can be a touchy subject, especially in this era of modern dating. But if you’re aware of traditional dating etiquette, picking up the check at the end of a date should be a comfortable, non-stressful situation.
Opinions abound on this issue, but it is important to keep in mind it is not about being a man or a woman but rather who issues the invitation. Here’s how to approach picking up the tab from a proper dating-etiquette perspective:
Customarily, the person who asks for the date—whether it’s for lunch, dinner, coffee, drinks, a movie outing, etc.— should pay. Typically, men tend to do the most asking-out, especially when it comes to first dates, but this is rapidly changing. Regardless, whoever does the asking should expect to do the paying, and not expect their guest to share the bill.
Now, even though it’s customary for the one doing the inviting to pay, these days it is a kind gesture for the invited party to offer to at least split the bill. That being said, accepting said offer and “going Dutch” is the universal sign of disinterest, so be aware of this while dating.
Every once in a while, you may encounter that person who absolutely refuses to let you pick up the check. Rather than arguing over splitting the bill and creating a scene, just say Thank You, and treat them the next time.
Would you like to learn how to be more charming? Would you like to learn more about the etiquette and manners of dating? Check out Polite Society’s Etiquette Courses!